


A Millenium Too Short

by orphan_account



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Also Lucifer Is A Douchebag, Angsty Canon Fix-it, Canon Divergence, Everyone Needs A Hug, How Do I Tag, M/M, Protective!Gabriel, Sam Winchester is Not Okay, Universe Alteration
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-30
Updated: 2019-09-30
Packaged: 2020-11-07 23:56:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,263
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20825933
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: Gabriel finds out about Sam’s experience in the Cage, but there’s not enough time. There’s never enough time.





	A Millenium Too Short

**Author's Note:**

> I’m back with even more angst! Aren’t you all so eXCITED???

No.

_No_.

They’d been so fucking close.

Gabriel buried his face in his hands. “Dammit, Sam.”

The hunter wasn’t there though; he was alone in some damp, dark place, dead. _Dead_.

_No. No. I can bring you back. I can. I know I can. _

Gabriel raised his head, suddenly feeling some sliver of hope. He closed his eyes and stretched out his consciousness, felt for that familiar warmth. He ran back through the caves, the tunnels, looking for his hunter in the dark. He turned a corner and for a split second he thought he’d actually found him, his grace just brushing against Sam’s soul, the pale white light of his essence. He was there within reach, but then he was gone and Gabriel was floundering in the dark.

But he’d been _right there_.

Gabriel opened his eyes, the grayness of Apocalypse World jarring after the dark of the caves, and felt his stomach hollow out.

He wasn’t even aware of when he started praying.

“Dad, please. You have to bring him back. For me.”

Nothing happened.

“Please,” and this time his voice actually broke.

But _nothing happened_.

Gabriel shook his head and smiled wryly. “Damn you.”

His head fell against his chest, but he didn’t let a tear fall. He didn’t deserve to mourn. Not after he’d failed so completely.

Jack asked him later. He looked as angry and terrified as Gabriel felt, voice full of bitterness and honest-to-Dad loathing.

“Why didn’t you bring him back?”

Gabriel didn’t have the energy to deny the truth anymore.

“I’m not strong enough.”

When Sam walked through the old barn, bloody and very much alive, Gabriel felt a moment of pure elation. He thought it had worked. He had been able to bring Sam back after all; he’d actually been strong enough.

But that moment dissipated almost immediately. Lucifer followed closely behind Sam with a knowing smile, and Gabriel hated him then more than he thought he ever had before. The way Sam’s face visibly fell like he thought that the Devil being there was somehow his fault (which it sure as hell wasn't) made Gabriel’s blood boil.

Sam embraced his mom, but Dean was there beside Gabriel, furious.

“You have the blade,” Dean spat at him. “Kill him.” And _dear Dad_, Gabriel wanted to, but—

“He’s not strong enough.”

The way Lucifer laughed, smiling at his brother like what he had said was somehow a joke, made Gabriel want to tell his brother to shove it up his feathered ass, but he knew Lucifer was right. He wasn’t strong enough. He’d said so himself. After all it wasn’t him who had brought Sam back.

Gabriel didn’t approach Sam after that. However much he hated to admit it, he was ashamed. Ashamed he couldn’t do what he should’ve been able to do. If he hadn’t been so low on grace. If he hadn’t been so tired and terrified. But he would never admit to that either.

The day dragged on. Gabriel volunteered to scout out the area as the rest of the group lagged behind. He tried to tell himself he wasn’t avoiding Sam. It didn’t work.

The angels caught him by surprise. He didn’t think; he ran. He ran right back to Sam. He summoned his angel blade and squared up right in front of the Winchester. It was his fault Sam had died in the first place; he’d be damned if it happened again. But the angels were gone in a matter of seconds, snapped into oblivion.

Lucifer smiled vaguely as the Enochian cuffs melted into pools of silver. “You’re welcome.”

Gabriel could almost feel Sam stiffen behind him. Gabriel had noticed this happened a lot whenever Lucifer was involved. Which prompted the question:

“What did you do to Sam?”

Lucifer looked up sharply, clearly surprised. He shifted, forearms still propped up against the decrepit old car of Bobby’s.

“All those years with Asmodeus, G. Let’s just say you and Sammy may have a lot more in common than you might think.”

Gabriel had his brother’s shirt in his hand, archangel blade to his throat.

“Touch him again, and I’ll send you to the Empty myself.”

As Gabriel walked away, Lucifer laughed.

Sam was running through supplies when he found him. He didn’t waste words.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Sam started. He turned to Gabriel, but his confusion quickly melted away as soon as he met the archangel’s steely gaze. His voice was faint.

“It wasn’t exactly like we had a whole lot of spare time.”

“Well now we do.” Gabriel was mad, furious.

“No, Gabe. We don’t.”

“Sam—“

“Gabe,” Sam said firmly, suddenly standing ramrod straight. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

There was a moment of tense silence that neither of them knew how to fill. Sam managed to smile softly, but, if anything, it only made Gabriel more angry.

_ I couldn’t bring you back. I couldn’t save you from my own brother. What the hell am I good for?_

“Listen, Gabriel. It’s not your fault. It’s no one’s fault.” It didn't sound like Sam believed what he was saying. “It happened. I’ve moved on.”

_You haven’t_.

“You haven’t.”

Sam heaved out a breath. “Yeah well it helps to pretend.”

This time the silence stretched on for millennia.

But Gabriel didn't have time for reminiscing. The rift was faltering. Michael was there. There wasn’t much time.

(_Not much time, not much time, not much time, not enough time—_)

“Go,” Gabriel stepped forward. He was weak and terrified. “I can buy some time.”

(_Not enough time—_)

“Gabriel, don’t!”

(_Sam, there’s isn’t enough time. Dammit there isn’t enough time._)

“All I did on Earth was run. I’m not running anymore.”

The words felt empty. That wasn’t why he was doing this. He wasn’t doing it for himself. He could tell Sam understood. Which made it even worse. Gabriel saw the terrified feeling settling in his own bones echoed on Sam’s face. _Goddammit_.

He wanted to say more. He wanted to tell Sam…well he wasn’t sure where to even start. There was a lot he wanted to tell him. He wanted to say he was sorry for all the times he’d made Sam’s life hell. He wanted to say that he pretended not to care, just like Sam pretended what happened in the Cage didn’t hurt anymore. He wanted to tell him that he cared about him. Probably more than he’d cared about any other human, hell any other _angel_, since the dawn of creation. He wanted to tell him that maybe he’d gotten too attached and that that was why he’d run away in the first place. But when it came down to it, there was only one thing he _needed_ to say. Three words that every human throughout all of time had said ten thousand times too many. He thought maybe now he understood...

(_There’s not enough time goddammit_.)

...but Michael wasn’t touching Sam. He would never touch him. Not if Gabriel had any say in it.

“Go!” His voice was stronger now.

But Sam didn't go. He didn’t leave. He watched as the blade tore through Gabriel’s vessel and into his grace and when it was all over, Sam was still there, watching.

And in the end, Sam didn’t scream out his name like Dean did. He didn’t run to his body and weep and drag it through the rift along with him. He simply stood there, frozen, and thought:

_Not enough time, not enough time, not enough time _

_A millennium and not enough time to say goodbye._

**Author's Note:**

> Here’s a fun fact for you. This did actually start out as a really angsty drabble that I posted on Tumblr, but I decided, hey why not draw it out and make it even angstier? So basically what I’m trying to say is that I honestly had no idea what I was doing while writing this. That shouldn’t come as a surprise though as I never have any idea what I’m doing.
> 
> So yeah more angst; I swear I will one day write something so fluffy it will rot your teeth.
> 
> I do have another Sabriel fic in progress called [Blood for Blood](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20743907/chapters/49287287) (I’m afraid it’s not too fluffy either). The first chapter is up, so you can go and give it a read if you feel so inclined.
> 
> Thanks for reading though, friends. As always feedback is greatly appreciated :)))


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